June 17, 1862
The Psalms for today reminded me of a hymn which I wrote years ago, before I was married, so I looked it up from some old papers & transcribe it here to see how I stand in an intellectual point of view. Have I improved? Candidly, which are the best, these or the lines I wrote Mrs Hines? Neither have any great claims. Both lack originality, but am I making as much of my material now as I did then? I hope so, for I can conceive no more sorrowful or humiliating thought than for one honestly to be convinced that he is not the man he was, that age or neglect has dimmed the force of his intellect, the brilliancy of his imagination. “Let me not live after my flame lacks oil, to be the snuff of younger spirits,” says Shakespeare—a wise wish—and one which I hope will be granted me. But to the lines:
Psalms 87:7th
All My Fresh Springs Shall Be in Thee!
When fainting in this strife I thirst
For living water from on high
O help my s truggling soul to burst
From earthly cares & find Thee nigh
O let me find my strength in Thee
In Thee may all my “fresh springs be.”
When in temptation’s trying hour
I feel my weakening spirit yield
Then send Thy Word—Almighty Power
To be my strengthner & my shield
O! give me then Thy Spirit free
And make my fresh springs flow from Thee
When ‘neath thy rod I murmuring lie
Rebellious at thy chastening hand
Then Lord my soul with grace supply
Meekly to bend at Thy command
O then in mercy make me see
That all my fresh Springs are in Thee.
When earthly joys grow dim in death
And like a dream my life appears
Then Lord receive my latest breath
And shield my soul from Earth born fears
O then my Refuge make me know
That from Thee all my fresh springs flow!
Source: Edmondston, Catherine Ann Devereux, 1823-1875, Journal of a Secesh Lady: The Diary of Catherine Ann Devereux Edmondston 1860-1866. Crabtree, Beth G and Patton, James W., (Raleigh, NC: North Carolina Division of Archives and History, 1979). http://nc-historical-publications.stores.yahoo.net/478.html
