but for the mourning dresses one would not have known that she was no more #cw150

June 19, 1862

Father quite sick and has sent for the Dr. Went to see Mrs Spruill & her daughters.  It is sad when one feels how soon one is forgotten.  How true it is that “their place shall know them no more.”  Poor Rebecca but for the mourning dresses one would not have known that she was no more & yet they are not heartless people.  O far from it, none more so, & yet there we sat, her most intimate friend & her family, & tho she was in all our thoughts not an allusion was made to her.  The way of the world I know, but is it a good way?  Is it a way that we ourselves like? And yet from fear of “a scene” all repress the natural expression of the heart & pass as it were an act of oblivion upon the dead.  It is not right!  It is over cultivation—unnatural & injurious.  I will no longer accede to it, but speak freely & sorrowfully & as my heart prompts of those who have gone before me.

Went to see Samantha & carried her some little rarities and delicacies proper for her situation.  They were just in time for I found her with an Infant, a daughter, not two hours old!  So I made but a short stay promising to come again soon.  Read L Allegro, Penserosa, and Comus to the girls.  They had never read them before & were surprised to find how many quotations constantly on their lips were to be found in them.  Read also the contrast between Melancholy & Pleasure in Burton’s Anatomy of Melancholy, thought by many to have given Milton the idea of L Allegro & Penseroso.  What a wonderful book, that. Burton is such a mine of thoughts, such a quarry of quotations, but the trouble with me now is that I cannot remember them as I once could.  Is it the war and its consequent preoccupation or is my memory less pliant than formerly?  I fear the latter, which is most mournful, as I have hitherto been gifted with a most excellent one, but nonsense, I talk like an old woman! and I am not yet a middle aged one.  I am still young and my memory shall not fail.

Tied my Grape Vines to their new trellises.  It ought to have been done before.  They would have thriven better.  They were given me by my dear papa, and I prize them the more on that account.  He wrote me that he could never expect to sit under them but wished me many happy years under “my own Vine & my own Fig tree.”  Dear old gentleman, he has left few behind him like himself, but he has been taken from the evil to come.  So we must not mourn for him, yet I miss him sadly.

Source: Edmondston, Catherine Ann Devereux, 1823-1875, Journal of a Secesh Lady: The Diary of Catherine Ann Devereux Edmondston 1860-1866. Crabtree, Beth G and Patton, James W., (Raleigh, NC: North Carolina Division of Archives and History, 1979). http://nc-historical-publications.stores.yahoo.net/478.html

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We have received a long letter from our daughter. #cw150

May 17th

We have received a long letter from our daughter. Mr. Williamson wrote that our daughter was confined on the 14th of April, had given birth to a son, and was doing tolerable well. (William Bethell Williamson.) I feel so thankful to God for blessing my dear daughter. I had faith to believe she would do well, the Lord heard and answered my prayer, glory and honor to his name. I will praise him with joyful lips, if I had a thousand souls I would give them all to God. Oh it is good to trust in God, “I called upon him in the day of trouble, and he delivered me, now I will glorify his name.”

Source: Mary Jeffreys Bethell Diary, 1853-1873.  #1737-z, Southern Historical Collection, The Wilson Library, University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill. http://docsouth.unc.edu/imls/bethell/menu.html

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1862: Cornelia making children’s clothes out of her old dresses #cw150 #sewing

Friday 2^nd [1862]

Mail came. I got a letter from Sister Jane. She has a daughter born 8^th April, is not doing so well, is going home as soon as she is able, wants me to go with her. I would like to go if it is compatable with Mr. Henry’s interests. Atheline still sick. I read till dinner & then made Willie a dress.  I have made two of an old gingham skirt & am going to make one of my pink calico dress I brought from Salem, also Zona one of that & Willie one of yellow muslin, a part of a skirt Lou gave me for Zona & me of a skirt Matt S. gave me to fix a dress of one with & there was some left.

Source: Diary of Cornelia Henry in Fear in North Carolina: The Civil War Journal and Letters of the Henry Family. Clinard, Karen L. and Russell, Richard, eds. (Asheville, NC: Reminiscing Books, 2008).

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we have heard of many bloody battles, thousands have been hurried into eternity…War, bloodshed, and desolation is before us #cw150

April 29

        Our servant Nat is some better, but cannot sit up much. We hope he will get well. Mr. Nubel Ratlif died last Saturday with the Palsy, he was 82 years old, made no profession of religion.

         My dear George is still feeble with the bowel complaint, he is quite weak, eats but little. I feel sad and gloomy today, these times of trouble do try my faith, but I hope it will all work out for my good. The Lord’s face is hid from me, darkness and gloom surrounds me, I cannot get any tidings from my daughter in Arkansa, have not heard from her in near two months.

         My dear Willie is in the army, exposed to the dangers of war, I have not heard from him in some time, I feel so anxious to hear from my dear children.

         I am just out of a spell of sickness, I have not recovered my strength yet, I feel a weakness in my womb, have to lie down to rest. In this time of trouble I will call upon the Lord, he is my only help, I pray for comfort and peace to my sorrowful soul. Our country is invaded by the enemy, we have heard of many bloody battles, thousands have been hurried into eternity. The enemy is advancing, and taken our citys and towns, the prospect is dark and gloomy. War, bloodshed, and desolation is before us.

Source: Mary Jeffreys Bethell Diary, 1853-1873.  #1737-z, Southern Historical Collection, The Wilson Library, University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill. http://docsouth.unc.edu/imls/bethell/menu.html

 

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feel very anxious about my boys, I would not be surprised if they were in a battle #civilwar150

April 15 [1862]

        This is a trying time for me, I have not heard from my daughter, Mrs. Williamson, in six weeks, I expect she is confined in childbed. I feel very anxious to hear from her.

         My husband is away from home, he went to see my boys in the army near Yorktown. I feel very anxious about my boys, I would not be surprised if they were in a battle, suspense and anxiety is so unpleasant, but I look to God and call upon him to comfort my troubled soul. I beg him to bless and protect my dear boys, George and Willie, and my dear daughter Mary Virginia.

         I am cast down and sorrowful, I cannot hear from my dear children, but my hope and trust is in the Lord. I find some relief in prayer, and reading my precious bible. I will try and be patient and resigned. I believe that God will hear my prayers.

         I have just heard of the death of poor Billy Lumpkins, I hope the Lord has mercy on him.

         Cousin Fanny Price died 6th April 1862.

Source: Mary Jeffreys Bethell Diary, 1853-1873.  #1737-z, Southern Historical Collection, The Wilson Library, University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill. http://docsouth.unc.edu/imls/bethell/menu.html

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Mr. Bethell had given me 45 drops of laudnum, which eased my pain #cw150

April 8th

        I am able to sit up now, I have been quite sick, I was taken on Sunday at dinner time the 30th of March. I was taken with a cold feeling, pain and flooding. I was alarmed, sent for Dr. DeJarnette, he came immediately, but Mr. Bethell had given me 45 drops of laudnum,* which eased my pain and stopped the flooding. I am just as weak as when I give birth to a child, it was a trial to my faith and patience, but the Lord was with me, and blessed me and answered my prayer every day, he is good to me, I will praise him with joyful lips for sparing my life and raising me up to health again. I am well except weakness, I did not feel willing to die then, I wanted to live for the sake of my family, and wanted to love and serve God better than I had done. I promised the Lord that I would be more faithful in instructing my servants and children, and fast oftener. I thank God for afflicting me, it done me good, it has proved a blessing to me.

         I have given myself to the Lord, he is mine, I am his, I want to be instrumental in bringing many souls to Christ.

         I am looking for a letter from my daughter in Arkansa, I have faith in God to believe that she will do well when she gives birth to her child.

*laudanum: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Laudanum

 Source: Mary Jeffreys Bethell Diary, 1853-1873.  #1737-z, Southern Historical Collection, The Wilson Library, University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill. http://docsouth.unc.edu/imls/bethell/menu.html

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I staid alone last night #civilwar150

Sunday 30^th

Cloudy with occasional sunshine, very warm. Sam has been gardening some for the last week. I staid alone last night. Atheline slept in the house. Jinnie is getting dinner. She has been staying with Ruth (George’s wife) since last Tuesday. She has been confined. Fannie is sick with headache. The negroes gone to prayer meeting at Academy. Tena has Willie. Pinck gone up to Taylor’s with Tom Tidwell. He came back with Taylor last Thursday.

Source: Diary of Cornelia Henry in Fear in North Carolina: The Civil War Journal and Letters of the Henry Family. Clinard, Karen L. and Russell, Richard, eds. (Asheville, NC: Reminiscing Books, 2008).

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I was very busy, the [sewing] machine did most of the work

Monday 24^th [March 1862]

I made Pinck a pair pants & began another pair. I cut them out this morning. One a jeans pair the other summer pants. I made them for him to go to South Carolina in. Atheline carded bats for her quilt which she will put in tomorrow. I made both pair of pants today. I was very busy, the machine did most of the work. They kill three hogs tomorrow.

Tuesday 25^th

Mr. Henry went to Asheville this morning. Nothing new over there. I got a letter from Sister Jane, also one from Lena. I have not heard from either in some time before. Sister Jane will be confined soon. I hope she may pass safely through. I began Pinck a pair drawers but did not finish them. I helped Atheline put in her quilt. Cold & cloudy yet.

Source: Diary of Cornelia Henry in Fear in North Carolina: The Civil War Journal and Letters of the Henry Family. Clinard, Karen L. and Russell, Richard, eds. (Asheville, NC: Reminiscing Books, 2008).

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her baby was born on the day of the fight in Hampton Roads #cw150

March 17, 1862

“St. Patrick’s Day in the morning.”  Came home to Looking Glass, partly on horse back, partly in the canoe, & partly on foot—on account of the water.  Father rode with us to the place where we took canoe.  Dear old gentleman, I am grieved to see him so despondant & low spirited.  It is so unusual for him that it is doubly distressing.  God send us good news to lighten his heart.  Found the Hyacinths in most beautiful bloom!  They are truly exquisite & as we came into the gate & their fragrance stole over us, the charm of a quiet home never seemed greater.  As they looked up to us in their peaceful beauty, smiling in the midst of these War’s alarms, it made us prize our seclusion the more.  Ah! Lord Falkland I could emulate you in the ingemination of Peace!  Peace!

            All the afternoon preparing a basket of eatables of divers kinds for Patrick to send to Col Leventhorpe at Hamilton.  I omitted to mention last night, not I am sure from want of thankfulness, that Thomas Jones was safe and that Mr Turner was absent on leave when the attack on New Berne occurred.  Happily for Sophia, as her baby was born on the day of the fight in Hampton Roads—the 8th—rather more than 9 days before the Newberne disaster.

 Source: Edmondston, Catherine Ann Devereux, 1823-1875, Journal of a Secesh Lady: The Diary of Catherine Ann Devereux Edmondston 1860-1866. Crabtree, Beth G and Patton, James W., (Raleigh, NC: North Carolina Division of Archives and History, 1979). http://nc-historical-publications.stores.yahoo.net/478.html

 

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I have more fears for my sons who are exposed to the dangers of war #cw150

March 10th

        I have heard of the death of aunt Martha Courts, she died in the faith, has gone home to Jesus Christ.

         This is a very gloomy time, we are daily expecting another terrible battle near Suffolk, it makes my heart sad to think of the time when my sons will march to the battle field and be exposed to the balls and fire of the Enemy, but I have prayed to God to cover their heads in the day of battle, and that their lives may be spared if it is his will, if it should be God’s will for them to fall on the battle field, I hope he will send his angel to comfort them and help them, and if they die, to bear their souls to Heaven. Oh! this is a dark and trying time. Mary Virginia my daughter expects to be confined in a few days. I know she feels sad as the Yankees are not very far from where she is but I believe God will take care of her, she is safe and will do well. I have more fears for my sons who are exposed to the dangers of war. Lord, increase my faith for my children. I do believe if either of them die from wounds received in the battle, God for Christ sake will forgive their sins and take them home to Heaven. Thank God for giving me such faith. My neighbors are all in distress, their sons are going to the army in a few days. Green Daniel, Charly, and Archy Watkins have volunteered to go. I believe every young man is going except a few.

         I think every Christian should fast and pray. The South will be over-run by the enemy, so it is thought by a good many. An awful time is before us. Oh! Lord have mercy upon us.

 

Source: Mary Jeffreys Bethell Diary, 1853-1873.  #1737-z, Southern Historical Collection, The Wilson Library, University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill. http://docsouth.unc.edu/imls/bethell/menu.html

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